goldenglasses | [Accidental Voice / Action]

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[Accidental Voice / Action]

[Vash has started to keep to himself more the past couple days. Rem's arrival had almost made him forget this day, but he could never really forget.

Today he heads out early, trying to leave the new house before anyone else is awake. He finds a spot near the fountain to do some early morning people watching before getting up and heading to the bakery. He stops outside, knowing this isn't really where he wants to be, it's just habit. He turns and heads to the flower shop instead. He doesn't stay long, just long enough to make sure that everything is still running smooth without Aerith.

He checks the time to duck over to Good Spirits quickly. He wants to be there and gone before Meryl's shift. He orders a couple of beers before he starts growing restless again. This wasn't right either. What was he suppose to do on this day? How could he ever fix this mistake?

Without much thought he grabs a couple bottle and heads out into the forest. He walks for a bit before just sitting down against a tree inspecting his find. People said this blue stuff was strong, now seemed to be a good time to try it out.

Some point in his drinking his journal falls out of his pocket and starts to record. For awhile it records very little until suddenly-]

CRASH!

[There's the sound of a whiskey bottle shattering as it's thrown against a tree. It's followed by silence that is slowly broken by soft sobs.]

I'm sorry... I'm so sorry. I - I didn't mean to.

(ooc: Anyone who wants to talk to Vash before he gets himself drunk is free to call for him over the journals! He'll have it on him all day! Or run into him pretty much anywhere.)

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No... [And he hangs his head a little like a scolded child. Deep down he knew that before he even started drinking. It was shameful. He can literally feel his chest and face burning with it.

It makes it hard to talk. So all he can find himself capable of doing as Rem continues is nod his head solemnly along.]

...Silly boy. [it's soft, as her arms wind around him again to pull him closer. there, there...]

It hurts. [she might not know what he had done, what he was grieving for... but she could sense the depth of his pain.] I know it hurts, and I'm so sorry. But you haven't forgotten, and you'll keep moving forward to create a future without this pain.

[Vash hugs back and finally lets lose everything he's been holding in and starts to sob violently into Rem's shirt.]

I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! [Although this time his cries of forgiveness are not aimed towards Rem, but the millions of people that were put through a living hell because of him.]

[it wasn't his fault. she would tell him... she would say it over and over again, if only she knew.

but she doesn't, and all she can do is keep holding her boy tightly, her head ducked and letting him release his pain.]

...I am too, Vash. I'm sorry.

[He misses her apology. To wrapped up in his own crying and apologies to hear it. Eventually he's just too tired and worn out to continue and starts to settle down a little.]

[she waits til he's composed himself a little... if we can really call it that -- standing still to let him lean, and still running fingers over his back soothingly.]

...it might not feel like it right now, but... it will be okay.

How!?

Because you will keep going. Put one foot in front of the other, and take all the things that you have done and been through with you.

It all has meaning! And everything has a purpose. You walk into the future knowing you have the power to change it... and you will make it a good future, Vash! I believe that. I absolutely believe in you!

But what about all the people I hurt? How can it ever be okay for them again?

It might not ever be okay, Vash. Not in the way you want.

But they have their own futures to create. They can find happiness, and choose how to live their lives. Their fates are in their own hands, just like yours is in your own.

Have faith in them to walk forward, too.

[He has had little fate in them, hasn't he? Now that you mention it, that just seems so wrong of him to do. It's just so easy to fall into that mindset when living on such a dry and dusty planet.]

I will, Rem. From now on I will.

I know you will. [and she'll be here to remind you, if you forget.]

Isn't there something else I can do?

[she tilts his face up to look down on him with a little smile.]

Getting you cleaned up might be a start...

Will you come home with me?

[No, he meant for other people, but he's tired of arguing.] Okay, I'll go home.

[she knows. but... one step at a time.

he can't do anything for anyone like this, right?

she outstretches palms toward him with a warm smile.]

Take my hands, Vash. We will go back together, and every step from here are steps toward the future. We won't look back... but we'll remember everything that came before!

[He hesitates just a moment. It seems like such a big step to take, but maybe he can with Rem here.] Alright, Rem. [He reaches out and takes her hand.]

[she pulls him up (best she can, anyway... WORK WITH HER HERE you big lanky thing) and slings an arm around his back once he's found his feet in case he needs... you know, a little support.]

I will be here for you, you know... [whether she means to help him face the future, or to take him home, he can decide for himself.]

[Vash gets up and sways a little on his feet, but at least helps get up and stays upright.] But, what if you leave again Rem? [It happened once before.]

What if you leave, Vash?

[she knows it was possible. he didn't consider it much, did he? that he might return home and leave them here, too. Luceti was mysterious, and it was an option. she's still smiling as she starts slowly guiding him out of the forest.]

You and I might not be able to see each other if that were to happen, but I would still have you here with me. I love you, silly!

I'd never leave you, Rem! [There's a slight edge of panic to his voice. Of course when he was sober he could think about something like that, but for now it seemed unthinkable.]

[oh, Vash. she tightens her hold around him, reaching up to wipe at his still damp cheeks.]

Of course you wouldn't. You're always here for me, you big crybaby. That's exactly the point, so don't you worry about anything like that!

Okay, Rem. [He's going to worry anyway.] I don't want to ever leave you.

I know you don't. Seeing you every morning makes me smile... I'm very glad you're here with me.

[there, there. come along now -- try not to trip over yourself. it'd be bad if you dragged her with you into a derp-pile.]

Me too. [And I hope you can hold at least some of Vash's weight. As every now and then Vash starts to sway and lean too far one way or the other.]

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