goldenglasses | [Voice]

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[Voice]

[Vash has been putting this off. Someone he doesn’t trust, taking him, and poking at him leaves a bad taste in his mouth; but with Knives here…]

[Filtered to John // 100% Unhackable]

I need to speak to you.

[Filtered to Wolfwood and Meryl // 100% Unhackable]

Where are you? I need to talk to you.

[Filtered to Knives // 100% Unhackable]

…

[Yeah? What were you going to say to him? Behave while I’m gone?]

[End Filter]

[After business has been taken care of and he’s talked to those he needed to, Vash heads out into the forest aiming for a river. It’s long past time to intensify his training with the spirits. For those who have gotten to know happy and laid back Vash - this is not him. He’s taking this training with Sona very serious right now and isn’t very chatty. His glasses are on.]

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Yeah. [it's about what he imagines your heart must look like-- so maybe it wouldn't surprise him.]

...so who's strong enough to carry you?

[Meryl. She's the person who pops into his head without even any effort, but he tries to shove the idea away. No. It wouldn't be fair to ask her to shoulder the weight he's taken up. It wasn't hers to suffer under. She deserved to live a happy, peaceful life. With someone she could grow old with. Not a life were every day you're left wondering who will take a shot at you next.

Meryl... Milly... Wolfwood...

They had all come after him when he had tried so hard so hard to leave them behind. It had been so long since anyone had chased after him for no other reason then they cared. They had all tried to help carry his weight with him. And Wolfwood had died for it.

After a long pause Vash finally speaks.]

I'm alright. [No one should have to carry the weight he's chosen to pick up. They had their own lives to live.]

[he almost stares, even though he should have expected it, by your track record] You really are an idiot.

-- do you think you can spend your whole life touching other lives, and expect that answer to satisfy people? [-- it uh. Would be great if Ginko could take his own advice on this one, but that's beside the point and far from mind.]

[Vash ducks his head, rubbing the back of his neck, and puts on a small, awkward smile.] M-maybe I am an idiot, but I'm alright. Really. [So don't worry about him! See! He's mister happy! He's ALWAYS happy! Why don't you people BELIEVE that!? You have enough to worry about already without him!]

[Ginko's to used to being outside of the you people, with their shared difficulties; weaknesses; strengths-- to take that line.

But you're like arguing with a force of nature-- and he's done that enough to know when it's pointless to disagree. So he looks at the water and speaks like he's talking to himself]

I wonder how many people believe you. [a sidelong glance and a half smile] You do sure smile a lot.

Eh? Hehe, you think so?

More that you'd expect. [quietly, almost dryly.

There's another question there, but it stays down, for now.]

Well... that's a good thing, isn't it?

Is it? [raising an eyebrow at the water]

Well, don't people smile when they're happy? [You know... other people.]

Hmm. Sometimes.

A smile is signal-- the signs we send to each other. [his gaze lifts to the trees] Not so different from birds. [the difference is that people tell lies.]

A signal that someone is happy, isn't it? [Now, is he playing dumb, or did he really just not get it?]

Well, that's the signal. [he adds, in either case-] But people have been known to send false ones.

[pause, still looking forward] Not that there's anything very wrong with that.

Sometimes it makes things easier to bear.

[Sometimes is right, but his well practiced smile never falters. Just changes into one of confusion.] Oh. They do?

[a sidelong glance] I'd think you've been around them long enough to learn that.

[You have no idea how long. But Vash doesn't say that. Instead he just shrugs with an innocent smile. Who me?]

[Yes. About that.]

You said you grew faster, than humans do. But that can't really be all of it, can it?

Eh? [Oh crap. He just HAD to run his mouth didn't he?]

-- because you're a Plant. [as calmly matter-of-fact as if you had had this conversation twenty times before]

Wouldn't make much sense for your brother to hate humans, if he was one.

Hey! He could have been adopted! [Notice how he's steering the conversation away from things you don't already know if he can.]

[he indulges it, for a second-- absently remarking] Could be. You did imply that Rem was not your biological mother.

[But even if it belongs to a younger mind, Ginko's memory has always been sharp, out of sheer necessity. And his impulse to pry is at about the same levels.

This is different, too. Because it's already clear that Knives' appearance is going to change things. And not everyone will be content with half an explanation why. So he turns-]

But you're the one who said you were a Plant.

...and you seemed the kind of kid to grow into lying. Not out of it.

I didn't lie about what I was. No one asked and it's not that important what I am, right? [As that's how Vash is. You have to ask the right question. He's also at least hoping what he's learned here in Luceti, that what he is doesn't matter, because back home it did.] I just didn't want people to think they had to treat me differently because of what I was.

That wasn't the lie I was talking about. [a long, green-eyed stare will just let that settle in, for a moment.]

And in this place? Why would anyone treat you differently? I don't really think that's what it is-- even if it is the case in your own world.

[a deep inhale, and exhale-- sidetracked briefly from his own line of questioning. Firmly, but without judgment in the tone]

I think that withholding information from people is the way you carry things. Because people can't be held responsible for something they don't know anything about. [his glance flicks to the side] Because worry is a weight, too.

And if no one knows the details, all the more reason for you to hold yourself solely responsible.

[No one besides Wolfwood has looked past all of Vash's misdirections and barriers to strike so close to the truth. For a second all he can do is stare in surprised. Don't suppose you'll break the mood by asking him to confess in a mini confessional would you?]

[Sorry, Vash ~~Ginko's canon was seinen from the start~~. But at least, after a moment, the strangely fixed blue-green gaze shifts away from him.]

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