[Action/Voice]

[goldenglasses]

[Vash is a constant figure in Good Spirits these days. Drinking just enough to feel numb and able to sleep every night. Only this last experiment had left him feeling a bit uneasy. How different he was after having spent nearly five years in Luceti. It left him feeling a bit nostalgic if he was being completely honest with himself. So there he sat at the bar, flipping through his journal and reminiscing a bit.

The first entry that causes him to pause is Katie's last message to Wolfwood. He misses the little scamp, but is glad that she was home. He just wishes he could figure out what she had been trying to say. He starts to trace her old message as he attempts to once again figure out what it meant. It's then that he starts to pick up a pattern.

The cremation of a fireman goes unremarked, but his remains remade remove...

Rem. That name. It was everywhere. Both Sanji and Knives have mentioned that name.

People visiting Good Spirits will see Vash dressed in a pair of jeans, a long sleeved button up shirt, with his long hair down around his face hunched over his journal. Flipping through it quickly. Playing bits and pieces of older entries. Then finally, there she was. A woman with black hair that he couldn't recognize, yet was talking to her in the past like she was the world to him. Who was this Rem?

Could his memory of her be lost from a death? But he couldn't eat baked goods anymore, that was his penalty for dying as a zombie, wasn't it? Could someone get two death penalties? Or- had he been killed without even realizing it?

Not only that, but he could tell just reading some of his past entries that he thought very differently when this woman was around. Just who was she?

Maybe it was the fact that he was drinking. Or the idea that if he wanted to fix this he'd have to leave himself open to John and the idea didn't sit well with him. Either way he eventually makes a post to Luceti at large.]

If you forgot someone, how important would it be for you to remember? Even if you thought remembering them would change you? The way you think? Would you want to remember even if the memories were bad and you probably won't meet them ever again?

[As the way Knives talked it seemed like Rem has been dead for some time in his world.

Eventually Vash will be sending out a private message out to John.]

Comments

[weathervain]

Yes.

[Said with the flavour text of well, duh.]

[goldenglasses]

Heh, I guess it does seem like it should be an easy choice, huh? [Although he's not so sure. Not when it requires a visit to John.]

[weathervain]

Well, they're your memories. They make you who you are. I know if I had the choice, I'd get back the ones I supposedly lost.

[goldenglasses]

Even if you weren't sure they would be good ones?

[weathervain]

You own them anyway. Besides, if you're not sure they're good ones, are you so sure they're bad ones?

[goldenglasses]

Well, there's nothing saying if they're good or bad. Just, if you're happy with your life right now, you wouldn't be afraid some new memories would change you? Be it for good or bad?

[weathervain]

Well... if you don't take them back, you're kinda missing a chunk of what makes you you, aren't you?

But that's my opinion. Everyone's different. [Considering she has to admit she's probably heavily influenced by knowing ther'es a bunch of memories of her being happy here.

She thinks of Robin.]

I guess it depends on whether you forgot anyone important. They'd probably be pretty crushed to know they'd been forgotten.

[goldenglasses]

Maybe. [He tries to smile in what he's hoping will pass for a kind smile. He's not exactly sure what sort of feeling his face should portray with something like this. So it defaults to his warm smile.] I can only guess that it's doesn't feel very good to have a bunch of people know you and not them.

[weathervain]

It's downright irritating. But we're not talking about me.

[Voice]

[fierybluebird]

Aye. It'd be the most important thing I can think of, eh.

No matter how it hurts, the people we meet help make us who we are.

[Voice]

[goldenglasses]

Maybe, but what if you weren't sure you were a better person for it? [Maybe he was knowing this Rem. He could tell he was changed, but was it for the better? Or worse?]

[Voice]

[fierybluebird]

[A sigh.]

How would you know without it?

There's a man in my past I'd give a fortune to forget, but I can't afford to. I used to think he was a friend. A close brother. To even remember moments of my past he was a part of is painful now, but I have to remember that pain so that I can use it as incentive to kill him. And to grow from it. Without remembering who he is, I can't defeat him.

Even though some things are excruciating, that doesn't mean they aren't a vital piece of us.

[Voice]

[goldenglasses]

Hm. [He looks into the glass in his hand. Swirling about his drink as he thinks that over.] I suppose... that's true.

[He takes a drink.] So, if you had forgotten and you would let a bunch of crazed scientists poke at you in order to put them back?

[Voice]

[fierybluebird]

Aren't the crazy scientists the one to remove them in the first place?

Aye. I suppose I would. In the last few shifts and with people coming and going, the one thing I've learned most is that memories are more important than we ever give them credit for.

But I say this with the wisdom of having most of my memories in tact. If I did not, who knows what I'd be, eh?

[Voice]

[goldenglasses]

Are you sure they're in tact? You could be missing a memory of a time or person and not even realize it.

[Voice]

[fierybluebird]

Those around me would notice and it would create black holes. You can't directly see the black holes, and it's no use shining light into them, but you can tell they're there by how everything around them reacts.

[Voice]

[goldenglasses]

Like... real black holes? [It's asked seriously, because Vash has seen a lot of strange things in Luceti. He's really not sure if Marco means literal black holes as some kind of power of his or not.]

[Video]

[spohkh]

Indeed. It is integral for a Vulcan to have all memories. The events that we experience with others help build who we are in a lifelong learning process.

May I inquire as to your well being?

[Because Vash's question seems rather... maudlin.]

[Video]

[goldenglasses]

Hm, I'm alright. [Kinda. He's learning he has a rather nasty death penalty that he doesn't even remember dying to get.]

Just doing some thought on some of the things the Malnosso can do to us. They change our memories so easily sometimes.

Re: [Video]

[spohkh]

You are not 'alright' or you would not have made such a message.
[Case in point. Spock has issues with people trying to say contrary things like 'fine' or 'okay'.]
Indeed, it is a disturbing ability that they hold over us.



Has something happened to you recently?

[Video]

[goldenglasses]

Not recently, no. [Sort of. The death wasn't recent, but the experiment that really got him thinking about things was.] Just thinking about this last experiment. How easily everything we think we know could end up being nothing but a lie. I guess... it's got me thinking just how important memories are in a place like this.

Re: [Video]

[spohkh]

You will find that you are not the only one suffering from that very thought. The best we can do is attempt to live through it.

[Spock hesitates for a moment...unsure of how much he should say.]

I believe there are various techniques that are being utilized to cope with this... loss of control.
[Because that's what it boiled down to, right?]

[Video]

[goldenglasses]

Are there? How well do they tend to work?

Re: [Video]

[spohkh]

That entirely depends on your ability to convince yourself that it is working.

[Irony abounds.]

[Video]

[goldenglasses]

... so they don't work... unless you TELL yourself they're working? Shouldn't you... not tell someone that if it's going to have a chance of working?