goldenglasses | (no subject)

[There's a small sight that shouldn't be to unusual at Good Spirits. It's Vash sitting at the bar chugging down a large pitcher of beer. What is NOT so usual is the fact that Vash is the wrong gender and dressed in a princess's dress. Seeing as there was no way he was going to go home looking like this for Wolfwood to find out he went to Good Spirits instead.

He lets out a large belch as he finishes the large glass in one go.]

Bartender! Another!

[Don't be surprised if a beautiful woman starts leering at any ladies in the bar at the moment. As Vash is getting pleasantly buzzed and at times forgetting he's not quite himself right now. At one point his journal flips open as he talks out loud to himself.]

Jeez, how can women stand these dresses? It's always getting in the way and I can't stop tripping on it! It also doesn't seem very useful if they have to go to... the... bathroom.

[Guess who just realized he can go into the promised land without getting smacked? Now to try this out. Vash walks into the girl's bathroom and - it's... very dull. Damn. Why didn't Luceti have a public bath or something!? This time he opens his journal on purpose.]

I don't suppose any girls wants to join me in a fun little girl's only trip to the hot springs do they? [>D]

[Sometime later, after the hot-springs if he manages to get anyone to go with him, Vash will be wandering around the fountain waiting to turn back. Damn, what is he going to do? It's starting to get dark. He can't go home looking like this! You know what would be good right now? Some donuts! Yeah! That's just what he needs! Only as he walks towards the bakery--

Poof!

Suddenly Vash found himself a lot shorter than he just was.]

OH CRAP! I wanted to change! But not like THIS!

[Vash will be waddling around in his new donut form trying to seek shelter from hungry people, feel free to find him anywhere! He's still teleporting so I mean ANYWHERE! Also, clicking the pictures will take you to a larger version.]

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[Vash has enough time to be disappointed as the clothing is flung towards his head and blocks his view. Then he has just enough time to think: Oh! This smells just like- only that thought is never finished, instead it's replaced by bright lights and stars as Nami's foot connects with his face.]

W-WHHHAAAA!

[Even if it sounds just a tad girly, that should be a well known yell to someone who lives next door to Vash. Not to mention having kicked him a few times before this.]

[Oh don't worry, Vash, she already well picked it was you. |D But for the record, her tanktop smells like mikan.]

That'll be one thousand dollars added to your tab, Vash.

What!? No fair!? Why!?

Viewer's fee. Or did you think standing in a woman's bedroom and leering at her while pretending you're someone else is perfectly okay? That's against the law, Vash.

Edited 2012-06-24 20:39 (UTC)

B-b-but I wasn't leering! I didn't ASK to come here!

Oh, so you had no choice about continuing to stare? That's a problem you should get looked into, Vash. I'd be happy to help.

I-I wasn't staring! We were just having a conversation is all! YOU DISTRACTED ME!

Ohhh? What did I distract you with, I wonder? [Crossing her arms. Under her breasts.

She still has no shirt on, by the way.]

[Vash swallows a bit hard, knowing he's going to die for this, but unable to look away from the beauty that is Nami.]

Oh... you know... with your stunning beauty.

Fifteen hundred dollars.

WHAT?! [Yet... still unable to look away!]

Two thousand.

[OH SHI- Vash finally closes his eyes and turns his head away for good measure.] No fair! You're taking advantage of the latest curse the Malnosso put on me!

[Not the best tactic to take, Vash. She's already tired of hearing about the 'evil Malnosso' this week.]

No, Vash. I'm punishing you for being an absolute pig. Any decent man would have averted his eyes the second he found himself in here with me. Don't even get me started on the fact that you lied about it.

I dunno about any decent man... [Have you SEEN yourself Nami?]

Ohhh, so your being a pig is my fault?

W-w-w-well I guess I mean, it's NO one's fault! Just the Malnosso! How about that!

Turning away, Vash! Apologising and walking out of the room! Are these things beyond you?

BUT I WAS DISTRACTED! ANY MAN WOULD BE EVEN AS A GIRL!

A DISTRACTION FOR A FEW SECONDS MAYBE I'D BUY. NOT STANDING THERE FOR FIVE MINUTES WHILE YOU TRIED TO CONVINCE ME YOU WERE SOMEONE ELSE!

B-But I was embarrassed! I had to try to trick you!

Of course. While still staring.

Well, you see! I was just - [POOF! Waiting to be teleported away again!]

[....

RUDE.]